Book Review : The Memory Keeper’s Daughter by Kim Edwards

This is a must-read, especially for families which have ‘special’ children. I am very impressed with her language; beautiful, very descriptive and easy to follow. It is a book of intense and complex emotions which make you want to reread and further understand the feelings of some of the characters.

Dr. David Henry delivers his wife’s twins. While his son is healthy, his daughter has Down’s syndrome. He tells his wife their daughter died, but secretly asks his nurse to take the baby to a welfare home. But Caroline, the unmarried nurse couldn’t bring herself to leave the baby in a welfare home and decides to raise the child herself.

Dr. David may appear to be an evil person, but actually he is not. His action was a result of his own family circumstances when he was young. He felt he was saving his wife (whom he loved deeply) all the grief and heartache which he and his parents went through when his sister died at a very young age. To him it was an act of love! However Norah, Dr. David’s wife finds it difficult to come to terms with this and is silently haunted by the ‘loss’ of her daughter.

Caroline, on the other hand struggles to raise the little girl in a community which still does not understand children with Down syndrome. She also sacrifices her love life to a certain extend to be able to give the child her full attention.

Kim Edward’s record of the child (Phoebe) growing up is also very moving. Her slow progress, not being admitted in a school for normal children and when she finally falls in love and wants to get married, but Caroline is not too sure about that and feels Phoebe is not ready.

Phoebe’s twin and her mother eventually discover her existence. How do they react? The book is so well written that you can actually feel the pain of the emotional struggles all the characters go through…

No wonder the book was a bestseller in the US and also in MPH.

Book Review ~ BRICKFIELDS : A Place, A Time, A Memory by Balan Moses.

Thank you Balan Moses for a nostalgic trip down memory lane. Much of what you have described in your book brought back fond memories of yesteryears. The places, the people and especially some of the childish games you described, I have quite forgotten until I read your book.

I did not live in Brickfields. My father worked with the Malayan Railways and so my family and I lived in the railway quarters along Jalan Bangsar. However Brickfields was a part of our daily life because my sisters and I studied in M.G.S., along Jalan Sultan Abdul Samad and we had to pass through Brickfields as we walked to and from school. There were several routes we could take – walk along Jalan Tun Sambathan and straight onto Jalan Sultan Abdul Samad, or walk along Lorong CA Thong, Jalan CA Thong or Jalan Rozario. I suppose our route depended on what we wanted to see, or if we wanted to linger along the shops to see or buy something. I still remember the end shop (opposite the Brickfields KFC now) which used to sell pets. I loved to stop to see the birds in that shop! Thus most of the places you have mentioned are very familiar. Good for you that the quarters you lived in still exists in Jalan Rozario. Our railway quarters is no more, it used to be where the present Bangsar LRT station stands.

The Lido theatre was an important landmark in our life – it was the focal point of our annual treat. We made a trip there on Deepavali day to watch either the Sivaji or MGR movie that was on. Visiting the Buddhist temple was also a must every Wesak Day, to get the orange thread tied to the wrist. Almost every non-muslim child wore this thread for several weeks after Wesak.

My mother bought mutton only from Naina’s mutton shop and you couldn’t have described him in any other way but the friendly giant! He was actually a good-looker with an ever ready broad smile. Yes, I remember the crowd waiting patiently outside his shop to get their order on Sunday mornings. Anthonian bookstore was another significant shop – to get our books and stationary especially before the new school year started.

Your naration of the mobile hawkers made me realize how environment friendly we were back then. There was no Styrofoam container and we used to bring out our own plates and bowls to buy the food. How could I forget bringing out our enamel or stainless steel cups to get the hot soup from the yong tau foo seller. How wonderful and convenient if we still had these mobile rojak, yong tau foo, pau and kueh sellers.

Did you keep a diary or just happen to have excellent memory? I remembered many of the games you mentioned such as kaunda kaundi, “catching”, tai chi and kicking the frangipani balls. But I had quite forgotten the “high five” card game and also throwing rubber bands to cross over the opponent’s rubber bands.

What you have written is indeed a beautiful historical record of our ordinary life 30 – 40 years ago. Reading it now made me realize how rich our simple life was. I actually feel sad for my children who are glued to their computers now. I can’t seem to share my excitement about your book with them, but I hope one day they would want to read it to know what they have missed.

Abuse of my chatbox!

Yes, there goes my chatbox! Thank you guys for your advice, I’ve heeded your advice and removed my chatbox. Now, I’m being informed that others are using my name and leaving indecent messages in other chatboxes. It does not bother me in the least.
Firstly, everyone who knows me will attest that I never utter indecent or vulgar words in any language that I speak. Have any of you heard any form of vulgarity from me? No way. Thus any bad language in your chatbox is definitely not from me!
Secondly, some people are plain spoilers! It appears their aim in life is to make other peoples’ lives miserable. Perhaps they have nothing better to do. Perhaps they enjoy this cheap thrill of upsetting other people. Perhaps that is how they have been brought up – to use fowl language and be born losers! Whatever their reason, I’m thankful for them. God can’t possibly accommodate all of us in Heaven. I suppose these people make God’s job a little easier. These people insist on booking their place in Hell! Let them. Hindus and Buddhist believe in karma. I strongly believe such people contribute towards my good karma. Heh! Thank you You!
I have finished marking my exam scripts and in fact have been catching up on my reading. I intend to review these books on my blog soon. Actually I got this idea from Pei Hau’s blog. He wrote quite a bit on restaurants and food, so I want to share my experience reading books.

Welcome to my blog

Wow! When Dhama put the chat box in my blogspot, I didn’t know it was another name for ‘complaint box’!! I think I should thank Philbert for making my blog popular overnight. Thank you Philbert! Hey Raja Petra, move over. You have competition here man!!
Before I continue, I also want to thank the others who have posted complaints in my chat box. You are most welcome to do so, but please don’t hide behind fictitious names. I don’t think it is the right thing to do – stealing someone else’s identity. Especially Pn. Marina Chin! She is not only the principal of a very important school, she is also a well-known personality in the country. I know it is not her style to say the things you have said, and her language is also much better then that! Improve your English or stop using her name. Be fair to her.
The complaints and issues mentioned are very reasonable. Is this what they mean by ‘barking up the wrong tree’? Why are you telling me all these? If there was a spelling error or content error in the certificates given out on Prize giving day, then tell me about it because that was my responsibility. But problems with invitation and selection of prize winners was out of my jurisdiction. If I had it my way, I will give away prizes to each student who successfully finished their school education, irrespective of the number of A’s.
As for the “Samad bashing” going on, I am just an ordinary teacher, teaching Moral studies and Geography. I feel honoured you feel you can tell me all these things but I’m powerless in the school. Please direct all your grievances to the school office. In no way am I involved in the school administration.
Actually I wouldn’t mind giving admin a shot but the ministry has not offered me any relevant posts. I wonder what the criterias are to be promoted into the school administration. I have been teaching for 24 years and never shirked my responsibilities at any time. Maybe my fault is I work hard and not work smart. Que Sara, Sara, what will be, will be!!
My technical assistant advices me to remove my chat box! Hey! Chat with me, I will love to hear from you. Don’t abuse it please. Thank you all for visiting my blog. Now I feel pressured to update my blog more regularly! I know I don’t have many posts, but whatever I have posted is important to me. I would appreciate feedback regarding my posts. I have exam papers, and folios to mark so don’t expect to hear from me in the near future.

POST ELECTIONS

OK. I know every Mary, Ann and Jane (as in Tom, Dick and Harry) have said their piece regarding Malaysia’s 12th general elections. There was much I wanted to say, especially during the campaign period, but was feeling apprehensive about what I had to say. In case I worded my post wrongly, I may be sued by the candidates!

Ever since I became aware of Malaysian politics, several things were very apparent. Most candidates come looking for us, the voters, only during the campaign period. After voting them in, it is we who have to make appointments to see them. They don’t seem to have much time for the people who put them in their Parliament seat or the state assembly seat. In Parliament, many seem to ‘wakil diri’ rather than ‘wakil rakyat’.

It is also during the campaign period when much is said about unity and harmony among the races. How the candidates are there to serve the public and not any one race. After the elections, it is all back to race-based political parties. It is during this time that much gets done in constituencies – roads are retarred, drains are cleaned, squatters get keys to new homes, abandoned projects and public’s complaints get attended to, etc.,etc.,etc. For this reason alone, I wish elections were held every year. Then, we, the rakyat will get our candidates attention more often.

In fact I have always felt the best thing that could happen to a constituency is the death of the elected representative! Don’t brand me cruel or nasty. Everyone can see how ALL ATTENTION is focused on the area that is having a by-election. The Ijok by-election last year was an excellent example. So much money was pumped in to improve the area and the people’s life just to win their votes. We read about how women who didn’t know how to sew were given sewing machines! Just imagine if such a tragedy were to occur once a month in the constituencies, one by one, a by-election every month will bring so much development to that area.

However my opinion has changed after the March 8th elections. It has been more then a month since the election, but our elected representatives are still so concerned for the electorate! They are stll actively trying to resolve issues important to us! Isn’t that wonderful? Will the people be the focus of our elected reps for the next 4 – 5 years? Wow! No wonder most developed countries have 2 parties system OR are the countries more developed BECAUSE they have the 2 party systems???

This is LOVE!

So how was Valentine’s Day? Did I receive a bouquet of roses? No. Heart shaped chocolates? No. A branded handbag? No. Perfume? No. Some other fancy gift? No. Am I upset or disappointed? No.

My husband does not believe in Valentine’s Day celebrations. He thinks it is too commercialized. Looking at the price of flowers and romantic dinners, I couldn’t agree more! But I was not saddened by it. We don’t need February 14 to DISPLAY affection and quarrel the next day.

I have been suffering from a bad backache after lifting a big pail of water when I mopped the floor last week. The household chores are shared between my husband and I mostly while the children chip in to help sometimes. My husband and my daughters knew about my suffering. However, when the weekend approached and it was time to mop the floor, it was my husband who insisted on doing the job so that I could rest my back which was still aching. Now, what do you call that, if not LOVE?!! My girls sympathized with me and offered backrubs to sooth the pain, but did not volunteer to do the painful task of mopping the floor.

What my husband did was a simple act, but it meant a lot to me. In actual fact, I don’t do the marketing; he does. I don’t pay any bills; he does. I don’t send my car for servicing, repairs and even filling up the petrol tank; he does. And he does a lot more for me.

God, how blessed I am! So if February 14 is the day to show your adoration for your loved ones, then most days are February 14 for me!!!

My 3 Diamonds

Last night my 15 year old daughter, Dhamayenthy and I reversed our roles. She became my ‘mom’ when she suggested that I should blog instead of playing FreeCell, my addiction, especially when I’m watching TV. I had only managed to put 2 posts on my blog when I forgot my password and had technical problems after that. She took about 20 minutes to fix the problem and even designed it for me. I love what she has done. Thank you Dhama!

What would I do without my children?!! In fact my blogspot was first started for me by Dhivia; my elder girl (read first post). My son Karthi takes care of my anti-virus and whatever other programmes I need. They also download songs for me. I just have to give them my ‘favourite songs’ list.

My 3 children are the best thing that has happened to me. Sorry dear (hubby), you have to settle for second place now even though I owe our children’s presence to you! There has been much pain bringing them up, especially when disciplining them, but now they are my best friends and it is such a pleasure when I’m with them.

I wonder if Karthi and Dhivia remember how they compared me with Cinderella’s stepmom and the wicked witch in ‘Snow White’ when I used to cane them for being naughty when they were young! Believe me, it hurt me too. Now, I’m so proud of them. They are my 3 diamonds; the jewels that sparkle and brighten up my life (and I’m sure my husband feels the same way too). Am I a biased judge? Please be informed that as a teacher I’ve been meeting and handling a couple of hundred teenagers every year for the past 23 years. So I have enough ‘samples’ to make comparisons with my children. They are so undemanding, very accommodating, reliable, obedient, loving (though Dhivia has a problem displaying it!) often understanding, etc. etc…KARTHI, DHIVIA and DHAMA… I LOVE YOU!